Monday, July 09, 2007

I happened to catch a clip of Mellisa Etheridge at the "Live Earth" concert for Global Warming last weekend. She had just finished her song when Al Gore came on stage to recite the seven tenets of the newest religion created. I'm keeping a personally tally sheet of monies collected for both Scientology and Global Warming to see who wins.

Since when did science need the help of political figures and celebrities to boost it's awareness? Many people have already pointed out how much carbon this whole shebang is emitting, so unless there's a Gulfstream V who's engines are "green" I'm betting the Live Earth concert tour around the seven continents will leave quite the carbon footprint. But this is permissible because the tour is basically saying, "Hey, see the mess we just made getting around the world to promote awareness for being "green"? Yeah, that crap is bad." Like the person that shoots a man just to show how bad it is.

Is this a mistake in reasoning? Or can we call it stupid?

Also perhaps we shouldn’t talk about all the heaters they’re going to use for the concert in Antarctica (One of the seven continents remember?) We may see an increase in ocean levels after all that ice melts.

My favorite part of the whole Live Earth thing is that it’s purpose is to promote awareness of Global warming. Well thank you Al Gore, see I’ve been living under a rock for several years. And I’ve just been waiting for a group of musicians (Historically the experts on political issues, oh wait, this is a scientific issue.) to come along and increase my awareness.

Lets review, Al Gores mansion takes enough power to service Darfur. And yet this is ok because the “credits” he is earning by his promotion of Global Warming Awareness. And this is done by flying jets around the world (With Energy Star compliant jet engines that burn corn oil right?) Does this mean that I can take money from poor people if I start an anti-poverty concert tour?

According to scientists, scientific theories are never proved absolutely true. This is because theories are based off of our own observations of the world around us. These observations are subjective to our own individual way of interpreting what we see and experience. So when Scientists in the 70s looked at their thermometers around the world and saw a decrease in the global temperature, they predicted the next Ice Age. So, the earths temperature that has been changing for millions of years has gone from on the brink of the next ice age to the brink of over warming the planet in just thirty short years.

This is truly incredible.

The planet that has taken millions and millions of years to achieve a temperate climate has gone from a predicted cooling trend to a predicted warming based on the current temperature trends. But this is swallowable only because the Foo Fighters dedicated their song to Al Gore and his cause. Let’s apply this current theory to the stock market and make a killing. If you take a snapshot of wall street in a given day, week, or month, the given trend may be going up or going down. Looking at a snapshot of the market as it’s going up and predicting a continued “up” trend is foolish. Many factors affect the complex model of the market, as do many factors affecting the complex model of Global Climate.

The best part is that we all need to believe that scientists, who are admittedly only "almost certain but not all the way sure" are to lead the way in "saving" our planet. We know that temperatures are rising on the planet. When did this become a bad thing? Scientists claim that global warming will increase the occurrence of storms and El Nino type weather patterns. Great El Nino did more economic good than harm. Bring it on.

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